Funeral things - Journal of Omnifarious
Feb. 17th, 2004
01:10 am - Funeral things
As I'm going through stuff and unpacking here, I'm coming across things I forgot I had. I came across the funeral program for my grandfather's funeral today. He only died 1.5 years ago or so.
It's odd sometimes how little things like that can bring back the sadness of the time they're from. And odd too how it's easier to feel the sadness now than it was then.
I think, sometimes, my analytical side takes over and masks my feelings even from myself. I've never been one to think that emotions are illogical, and pointless, but I've often used my ability to step back from things and look at them that way as a sort of shield. Things end up buried and processed slowly over long periods of time. I find things to think about that keep me occupied.
I consciously surround myself with hidden small reminders of things that are important to me. I do it precisely so I will come upon them unexpectedly as I did with my grandfather's funeral program today.
I wish I had known my grandfather better. My family's recollection of him is so much more rich than mine. I will do everything I can to avoid letting myself become as disconnected from the world as he was.